Real Programmers Code of Conduct
Real Programmers Code of Conduct
- Real programmers don't write specs -- Users should consider
themselves lucky to get any programs at all and take what they get.
- Real programmers don't comment their code. If it was hard to
write, it should be hard to read.
- Real programmers don't write application programs, they program
right down on the bare metal. Application programming
is for feebs who can't do systems programming.
- Real programmers don't eat quiche. They eat twinkies, and
szechevan food.
- Real programmers programs never work right the first time.
But if you throw them on the machine they can be patched
into working in only a few 30-hours debugging sessions.
- Real programmers don't write in Fortran. Fortran is for pipe
stress freaks and crystallography weenies.
- Real programmers never work 9 to 5. If any real programmers
are around at 9 am, it's because they were up all night.
- Real programmers don't write in BASIC. Actually, no program mers
write in BASIC, after the age of 12.
- Real programmers don't document. Documentation is for simps
who can't read the listings or the object deck.
- Real programmers don't write in Pascal, or Bliss, or Ada, or
any of those pinko computer science languages. Strong typing
is for people with weak memories.
- Real programmers know better than the users what they need.
- Real programmers think structured programming is a communist
plot.
- Real programmers don't use schedules. Schedules are for manager's
toadies. Real programmers like to keep their manager
in suspense.
- Real programmers think better when playing adventure.
Author Unknown